The Shining 原版小说-第114部分
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ribs and some internal injuries。 The back was the slowest healing; and she was
still in the brace 。。。 hence the formal posture。 But the change was more than
that。 She looked older; and some of the laughter had gone out of her face。 Now;
as she sat reading her book; Hallorann saw a grave sort of beauty there that had
been missing on the day he had first met her; some nine months ago。 Then she had
still been mostly girl。 Now she was a woman; a human being who had been dragged
around to the dark side of the moon and had e back able to put the pieces
back together。 But those pieces; Hallorann thought; they never fit just the same
way again。 Never in this world。
She heard his step and looked up; closing her book。 〃Dick! Hi!〃 She started to
rise; and a little grimace of pain crossed her face。
〃Nope; don't get up;〃 he said。 〃I don't stand on no ceremony unless it's white
tie and tails。〃
She smiled as he came up the steps and sat down next to her on the porch。
〃How is it going?〃
〃Pretty fair;〃 he admitted。 〃You try the shrimp creole tonight。 You gonna like
it。〃
〃That's a deal。〃
〃Where's Danny?〃
〃Right down there。〃 She pointed; and Hallorann saw a small figure sitting at
the end of the dock。 He was wearing jeans rolled up to the knee and a red…
striped shirt。 Further out on the calm water; a bobber floated。 Every now and
then Danny would reel it in; examine the sinker and hook below it; and then toss
it out again。
〃He's gettin brown;〃 Hallorann said。
〃Yes。 Very brown。〃 She looked at him fondly。
He took out a cigarette; tamped it; lit it。 The smoke raftered away lazily in
the sunny afternoon。 〃What about those dreams he's been havin?〃
〃Better;〃 Wendy said。 〃Only one this week。 It used to be every night;
sometimes two and three times。 The explosions。 The hedges。 And most of all 。。。
you know。〃
〃Yeah。 He's going to be okay; Wendy。〃
She looked at him。 〃Will he? I wonder。〃
Hallorann nodded。 〃You and him; you're ing back。 Different; maybe; but
okay。 You ain't what you were; you two; but that isn't necessarily bad。〃
They were silent for a while; Wendy moving the rocking chair back and forth a
little; Hallorann with his feet up on the porch rail; smoking。 A little breeze
came up; pushing its secret way through the pines but barely ruffling Wendy's
hair。 She had cut it short。
〃I've decided to take Al — Mr。 Shockley — up on his offer;〃 she said。
Hallorann nodded。 〃It sounds like a good job。 Something you could get
interested in。 When do you start?〃
〃Right after Labor Day。 When Danny and I leave here; we'll be going right on
to Maryland to look for a place。 It was really the Chamber of merce brochure
that convinced me; you know。 It looks like a nice town to raise a kid in。 And
I'd like to be working again before we dig too deeply into the insurance money
Jack left。 There's still over forty thousand dollars。 Enough to send Danny to
college with enough left over to get him a start; if it's invested right。〃
Hallorann nodded。 〃Your mom?〃
She looked at him and smiled wanly。 〃I think Maryland is far enough。〃
〃You won't forget old friends; will you?〃
〃Danny wouldn't let me。 Go on down and see him; he's been waiting all day。〃
〃Well; so have I。〃 He stood up and hitched his cook's whites at the hips。 〃The
two of you are going to be okay;〃 he repeated。 〃Can't you feel it?〃
She looked up at him and this time her smile was warmer。 〃Yes;〃 she said。 She
took his hand and kissed it。 〃Sometimes I think I can。〃
〃The shrimp creole;〃 he said; moving to the steps。 〃Don't forget。〃
〃I won't。〃
He walked down the sloping; graveled path that led to the dock and then out
along the weather…beaten boards to the end; where Danny sat with his feet in the
clear water。 Beyond; the lake widened out; mirroring the pines along its verge。
The terrain was mountainous around here; but the mountains were old; rounded and
humbled by time。 Hallorann liked them just fine。
〃Catchin much?〃 Hallorann said; sitting down next to him。 He took off one
shoe; then the other。 With a sigh; he let his hot feet down into the cool water。
〃No。 But I had a nibble a little while ago。〃
〃We'll take a boat out tomorrow morning。 Got to get out in the middle if you
want to catch an eatin fish; my boy。 Out yonder is where the big ones lay。〃
〃How big?〃
Hallorann shrugged。 〃Oh 。。。 sharks; marlin; whales; that sort of thing。〃
〃There aren't any whales!〃
〃No blue whales; no。 Of course not。 These ones here run to no more than eighty
feet。 Pink whales。〃
〃How could they get here from the ocean?〃
Hallorann put a hand on the boy's reddish…gold hair and rumpled it。 〃They swim
upstream; my boy。 That's how。〃
〃Really?〃
〃Really。〃
They were silent for a time; looking out over the stillness of the lake;
Hallorann just thinking。 When he looked back at Danny; he saw that his eyes had
filled with tears。
Putting an arm around him; he said; 〃What's this?〃
〃Nothing;〃 Danny whispered。
〃You're missin your dad; aren't you?〃
Danny nodded。 〃You always know。〃 One of the tears spilled from the corner of
his right eye and trickled slowly down his cheek。
〃We can't have any secrets;〃 Hallorann agreed。 〃That's just how it is。〃
Looking at his pole; Danny said: 〃Sometimes I wish it had been me。 It was my
fault。 All my fault。〃
Hallorann said; 〃You don't like to talk about it around your mom; do you?〃
〃No。 She wants to forget it ever happened。 So do I; but — 〃
〃But you can't。〃
〃No。°。
〃Do you need to cry?〃
The boy tried to answer; but the words were swallowed in a sob。 He leaned his
head against Hallorann's shoulder and wept; the tears now flooding down his
face。 Hallorann held him and said nothing。 The boy would have to shed his tears
again and again; he knew; and it was Danny's luck that he was still young enough
to be able to do that。 The tears that heal are also the tears that scald and
scourge。
When he had quieted a little; Hallorann said; 〃You're gonna get over this。 You
don't think you are right now; but you will。 You got the shi — 〃
〃I wish I didn't!〃 Danny choked; his voice still thick with tears。 〃I wish I
didn't have it!〃
〃But you do;〃 Hallorann said quietly。 〃For better or worse。 You didn't get no
say; little boy。 But the worst is over。 You can use it to talk to me when things
get rough。 And if they get too rough; you just call me and I'll e。〃
〃Even if I'm down in Maryland?〃
〃Even there。〃
They were quiet; watching Danny's bobber drift around thirty feet out from the
end of the dock。 Then Danny said; almost too low to be heard; 〃You'll be my
friend?〃
〃As long as you want me。〃
The boy held him tight and Hallorann hugged him。
〃Danny? You listen to me。 I'm going to talk to you about it this once and
never again this same way。 There's some things no six…year…old boy in the world
should have to be told; but the way things should be and the way things are
hardly ever get together。 The world's a hard place; Danny。 It don't care。 It
don't hate you and me; but it don't love us; either。 Terrible things happen in
the world; and they're things no one can explain。 Good people die in bad;
painful ways and leave the folks that love them all alone。 Sometimes it seems
like it's only the bad people who stay healthy and prosper。 The world don't love
you; but your momma does and so do I。 You're a good boy。 You grieve for your
daddy; and when you feel you have to cry over what happened to him; you go into
a closet or under your covers and cry until it's all out of you again。 That's
what a good son has to do。 But see that you get on。 That's your job in this hard
world; to keep your love alive and see that you get on; no matter what。 Pull
your act together and just go on。〃
〃All right;〃 Danny whispered。 〃I'll e see you again next summer if you want
。。。 if you don't mind。 Next summer I'm going to be seven。〃
〃And I'll be sixty…two。 And I'm gonna hug your brains out your ears。 But let's
finish one summer before we get on to the next。〃
〃Okay。〃 He looked