gossip girl 11 英文-第7部分

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Anyway；　Prague　is　amazing。　Staying　solo　at　Mom？s　flat　（how　very　European　of　me；　right？）　is　
super…fun　but　a　little　lonely。　I？ll　be　back　soon　to　pack　for　Waverly　（yay！）；　but　until　then；Na　
shledanou！　（That？s　？goodbye。？）　

I　miss　you　guys　and　I　miss　New　York。　Have　a　cupcake　from　our　favorite　place　on　Amsterdam　for　
me。　Make　it　a　pink　one！　

Love；　

　Jenny　

this　would　be　really　funny　if　it　wasn？t　happening　to　someone　we　know　and　love　


Dan　lay　on　the　bed　in　Vanessa？s　room；　his　notebook　open　across　his　lap。　The　empty　white　page　
was　practically　blinding　him。　It　was　the　same　story　every　night？he　would　sit　there　staring　at　a　
blank　page　for　hours；　trying　to　write　a　poem　about　love　for　Ruby？s　wedding；　until；　pletely　
dejected；　he？d　finally　just　pass　out。　He　started　to　scribble。　

　Love。　Above。　Shove。　

I　love　to　shove　you　from　above？　

Kiss。　Bliss。　Piss。　

Crap。　This　wasn？t　working。　Every　time　he　tried　to　write；　visions　of　himself　as　a　kid；　dressing　up　
in　totally　gay　outfits；　sprang　into　his　head。　What　could　he　possibly　know　about　love　when　the　only　
time　he？d　ever　been　in　love　was　with　Vanessa；　who　apparently　didn？t　qualify；　since　she　wasn？t　
even　the　right　gender？　He　looked　over　at　the　clock。　One　a。m。　It　had　been　a　long　day　of　shelving　
dusty　books　at　the　Strand　and　trying　to　hide　from　Greg。　Luckily；　their　shifts　only　overlapped　for　an　
hour；　so　Dan　had　managed　to　pletely　avoid　crossing　paths。　He　dreaded　the　？special　talk？　Greg　
said　he　wanted　to　have；　though　he　wasn？t　sure　how　long　he　could　put　it　off。　

He　sat　up　and　a　flash　of　gold　text　caught　his　eye。　The　anthology　his　mom　had　given　him　three　
nights　ago　was　perched　on　top　of　the　dresser。　With　its　black　cover；　the　book　was　almost　
camouflaged　by　the　monochromatic；　gray　space？Vanessa　had　gotten　permission　from　Jenny　to　
redecorate；　which　for　Vanessa　meant　making　everything　as　dark　as　possible？but　the　gold　title　
twinkled　at　him　from　afar；　taunting　him。　

Oh；　e　now；　you　know　you？re　curious。　

He　reached　over　and　grabbed　the　large　volume；　plopping　back　down　on　the　bed　with　it。　Maybe　
reading　some　gay　love　poems　would　help　inspire　him　to　write　a　straight　one？　He　cracked　open　its　
stiff　binding。　The　first　page　was　the　introduction。　

Homosexual　love　has　been　a　part　of　every　society　throughout　the　history　of　mankind；　from　the　
Ancient　Greeks　to　modern　day。　

What　was　this；　a　history　lesson？　Already　bored；　Dan　scanned　down　toward　the　end。　

Read　the　poems　aloud　to　your　lover；　as　the　spoken　word　is　even　more　powerful　than　those　
printed　on　the　page。You　will　feel　yourself　transported　by　the　undercurrent　of　beautiful；　corporeal；　
HomoSensual　love。　

Huh。　That　was　interesting。　He？d　always　found　it　helpful　to　read　his　own　poems　aloud　to　get　a　
sense　of　the　rhythm；　but　he？d　never　tried　doing　it　with　other　people？s　work。　Maybe　reading　aloud　
would　get　the　creative　juices　flowing；　get　him　feeling　the　rhythm？　Besides；　hedid　have　a　great　


reading　voice；　as　Greg　had　once　pointed　out。　

He　flipped　the　book　open　to　a　random　place　and　chuckled　when　he　realized　he？d　landed　on　page　

69。　No　matter。　He　cleared　his　throat　and　began　to　read　Shakespeare？s　Sonnet　18：？Shall　I　pare　
thee　to　a　summer？s　day？　Thou　art　more　lovely　and　more　temperate：　Rough　winds　do　shake　the　
darling　buds　of　May。　。　。　。　？　Dan　paused　to　read　silently　to　himself　for　a　few　lines；　and　then　again　
read　aloud。？So　long　as　men　can　breathe　or　eyes　can　see；　So　long　lives　this　and　this　gives　life　to　
thee。？　
As　he　uttered　the　last　lines　of　his　poem；　the　door　swung　open　and　Vanessa　burst　into　the　room；　
her　camera　bag　slung　over　her　shoulder。　

　Whoopsie。　

Her　eyes　widened　with　surprise。　Clearly　she？d　heard　everything？or　at　least；　enough。　Dan　could　
only　imagine　what　it　looked　like。　He　was　in　bed　all　alone；　reciting　one　of　Shakespeare？s　most　
romantic？and　unquestionably　gay？sonnets　to　himself。　

　Hello；　awkward？　

？Uh；　sorry。？　Vanessa　quickly　turned　around　and　stared　at　the　floor　as　Dan　frantically　grabbed　for　
the　book　and　closed　it　with　a　loud　smack。　He　stood　and　attempted　to　put　it　on　the　cluttered　desk。　

？It？s　not　what　it　looks？ow！？　The　book　fell　off　the　side　of　the　desk；　all　ten　pounds　of　it　landing　
directly　on　his　little　toe。　

？No；　no。　I　should　have　knocked。？　Vanessa？s　head　was　entirely　red　as　she　bent　over　her　bag；　not　
looking　at　him。　

？So。？　Dan　examined　his　cuticles　as　she　continued　to　put　away　her　camera　equipment。　？Where　
were　you；　anyway？？　He　tried　to　project　an　aura　of　calmness；　grabbing　a　copy　of　

Dostoyevsky？sCrime　and　Punishment　from　the　nightstand　and　flipping　aimlessly　through　its　
thick　pages。　

Like　that？s　the　only　thing　he？s　been　reading。　

Vanessa　finally　turned　to　face　him。　？I　was　filming　Ruby？s　last　gig　as　a　single　woman；？　she　
explained；　stripping　off　a　pair　of　expensive…looking　wide…legged　black　sailor　pants？likely　
something　Blair　had　left　behind　during　her　brief　tenure　as　Vanessa？s　roommate。　She　was　wearing　
an　old　pair　of　Dan？s　green…and…white…striped　boxers　underneath。　Then　she　pulled　off　her　plain　
black　T…shirt　so　that　she　was　clad　in　only　the　boxers　and　a　white　Hanes　tank　top。　Dan　had　always　
loved　Vanessa？s　fashion　sense？or　lack　of　it？and　he　couldn？t　help　noticing　how　sexy　she　looked。　It　
was　nice　to　see　her　wearing　something　of　his。　？Everyone　was　wasted。　At　the　end　of　the　set；　


Ruby？s　drummer　puked　onstage。？　？Gross。？　Dan　pulled　off　his　army　green　Kafka　T…shirt　and　
scooted　under　the　covers。　

？Totally；？　she　agreed；　climbing　under　the　sheets　beside　him　and　switching　off　the　bedside　light。　
Hopefully　the　darkness　would　hide　her　embarrassment　and　confusion。　They　lay　in　unfortable　
silence；　and　Vanessa　couldn？t　help　but　give　in　to　her　feeling　of　total　dejection。　After　her　
conversation　with　Piotr；　she？d　felt　so　。　。　。　hopeful。　She？d　thought　she　might　be　able　to　work　things　
out　with　Dan；　but　if　he　was　spending　his　free　time　home　alone　reciting　romantic　gay　poetry　to　
himself；　there　really　wasn？t　any　question　about　his　sexual　status　now。　She　sighed　heavily；　looking　
up　at　the　dark　ceiling。　

Dan　tried　hard　to　think　of　something　to　say。　He？d　never　had　trouble　talking　to　Vanessa　
before？she　was　his　best　friend。　In　fact；　she　was　one　of　the　only　people　he　reallycould　talk　to。　In　
less　than　a　week　he？d　be　driving　out　to　Evergreen　College　in　Washington　State　to　start　a　new　
life？in　a　1977　Buick　Skylark；　no　less？and　he　had　to　figure　all　this　out　before　he　got　into　that　car　
and　drove　away。　Why　couldn？t　he　talk　to　her　now；　when　he　needed　her　the　most？　

Maybe　because　she　just　walked　in　on　him　reading　in　iambic　pen…maneater。　

？So　。　。　。？　he　whispered　into　the　dark。　？Are　you　doing　okay？　I　mean；　with　Ruby？s　wedding　and　
everything？？　Vanessa　snorted。　Dan　could　picture　the　face　she　was　almost　certainly　making？her　
eyes　rolled　to　the　ceiling；　a　wry　twist　turning　up　the　corners　of　her　lips。　

？Yeah；？　she　breathed。　？I　just　have　to　film　the　clusterfuck。？　He　heard　her　exhale　heavily　into　the　
warm；　humid　air　before　she　spoke　again。　？You？rethe　one　I　feel　sorry　for？I　mean；　you　have　to　e　
up　with　some　meaningful；　epic　fuckinglove　poem　about　those　two　morons。？　？Thanks；？　Dan　
mumbled　sarcastically。　？You？ve　filled　me　with　confidence。？　He　turned　over　to　face　her；　wanting　to　
look　at　her　even　though　she　was　turned　away。　He　could　hear　the　small；　quiet　sound　of　her　
breathing　in　the　dark　room　and　could　feel　the　warmth　of　her　almost…naked　body。　She　was　always　
so　warm　at　night。　The　ridiculously　soft　skin　of　her　bare　arm　grazed　his。　One　of　the　things　he？d　
always　loved　about　Vanessa？s　body　were　its　contrasts？her　stubbly　scalp　next　to　the　softness　of　her　
skin。　The　pillowy　feel　of　her　lips　and　cheeks　。　。　。　Dan　smiled　and　moved　ever　so　slightly　closer　to　
her　warm；　sleepy　flesh。　

Vanessa　felt　Dan？s　hot　breath　tickle　her　neck　as　he　lay　inches　from　her　on　the　bed。　Being　in　such　
close　quarters　with　him　when　all　her　hopes　had　been　so　recently　dashed　was　killing　her。　？So；　
how？s　Greg？？　she　asked　softly；　hoping　the　note　of　rejection　in　her　voice　wasn？t　as　clear　to　him　as　
it　sounded　to　her。　She　moved　toward　the　edge　of　the　bed；　shifting　so　that　her　left　foot　hung　off　the　
side。　Anything　to　escape