永别了,武器(英文版)海明威著-第29部分

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y　here　to…night　and　go　out　to…morrow　with　the　little　car　and　send　Gino　back。　I'll　send　somebody　with　you　that　knows　the　road。　Gino　will　tell　you　everything。　They　are　shelling　quite　a　little　still　but　it　is　all　over。　You　will　want　to　see　the　Bainsizza。〃
〃I'm　glad　to　see　it。　I　am　glad　to　be　back　with　you　again；　Signor　Maggiore。〃
He　smiled。　〃You　are　very　good　to　say　so。　I　am　very　tired　of　this　war。　If　I　was　away　I　do　not　believe　I　would　e　back。〃
〃Is　it　so　bad？〃
〃Yes。　It　is　so　bad　and　worse。　Go　get　cleaned　up　and　find　your　friend　Rinaldi。〃
I　went　out　and　carried　my　bags　up　the　stairs。　Rinaldi　was　not　in　the　room　but　his　things　were　there　and　I　sat　down　on　the　bed　and　unwrapped　my　puttees　and　took　the　shoe　off　my　right　foot。　Then　I　lay　back　on　the　bed。　I　was　tired　and　my　right　foot　hurt。　It　seemed　silly　to　lie　on　the　bed　with　one　shoe　off；　so　I　sat　up　and　unlaced　the　other　shoe　and　dropped　it　on　the　floor；　then　lay　back　on　the　blanket　again。　The　room　was　stuffy　with　the　window　closed　but　I　was　too　tired　to　get　up　and　open　it。　I　saw　my　things　were　all　in　one　corner　of　the　room。　Outside　it　was　getting　dark。　I　lay　on　the　bed　and　thought　about　Catherine　and　waited　for　Rinaldi。　I　was　going　to　try　not　to　think　about　Catherine　except　at　night　before　I　went　to　sleep。　But　now　I　was　tired　and　there　was　nothing　to　do；　so　I　lay　and　thought　about　her。　I　was　thinking　about　her　when　Rinaldi　came　in。　He　looked　just　the　same。　Perhaps　he　was　a　little　thinner。
〃Well；　baby；〃　he　said。　I　sat　up　on　the　bed。　He　came　over；　sat　down　and　put　his　arm　around　me。　〃Good　old　baby。〃　He　whacked　me　on　the　back　and　I　held　both　his　arms。
〃Old　baby；〃　he　said。　〃Let　me　see　your　knee。〃
〃I'll　have　to　take　off　my　pants。〃
〃Take　off　your　pants；　baby。　We're　all　friends　here。　I　want　to　see　what　kind　of　a　job　they　did。〃　I　stood　up；　took　off　the　breeches　and　pulled　off　the　knee…brace。　Rinaldi　sat　on　the　floor　and　bent　the　knee　gently　back　and　forth。　He　ran　his　finger　along　the　scar；　put　his　thumbs　together　over　the　kneecap　and　rocked　the　knee　gently　with　his　fingers。
〃Is　that　all　the　articulation　you　have？〃
〃Yes。〃
〃It's　a　crime　to　send　you　back。　They　ought　to　get　plete　articulation。〃
〃It's　a　lot　better　than　it　was。　It　was　stiff　as　a　board。〃
Rinaldi　bent　it　more。　I　watched　his　hands。　He　had　fine　surgeon's　hands。　I　looked　at　the　top　of　his　head；　his　hair　shiny　and　parted　smoothly。　He　bent　the　knee　too　far。
〃Ouch！〃　I　said。
〃You　ought　to　have　more　treatment　on　it　with　the　machines；〃　Rinaldi　said。
〃It's　better　than　it　was。〃
〃I　see　that；　baby。　This　is　something　I　know　more　about　than　you。〃　He　stood　up　and　sat　down　on　the　bed。　〃The　knee　itself　is　a　good　job。〃　He　was　through　with　the　knee。　〃Tell　me　all　about　everything。〃
〃There's　nothing　to　tell；〃　I　said。　〃I've　led　a　quiet　life。〃
〃You　act　like　a　married　man；〃　he　said。　〃What's　the　matter　with　you？〃
〃Nothing；〃　I　said。　〃What's　the　matter　with　you？〃
〃This　war　is　killing　me；〃　Rinaldi　said；　〃I　am　very　depressed　by　it。〃　He　folded　his　hands　over　his　knee。
〃Oh；〃　I　said。
〃What's　the　matter？　Can't　I　even　have　human　impulses？〃
〃No。　I　can　see　you've　been　having　a　fine　time。　Tell　me。〃
〃All　summer　and　all　fall　I've　operated。　I　work　all　the　time。　I　do　everybody's　work。　All　the　hard　ones　they　leave　to　me。　By　God；　baby；　I　am　being　a　lovely　surgeon。〃
〃That　sounds　better。〃
〃I　never　think。　No；　by　God；　I　don't　think；　I　operate。〃
〃That's　right。〃
〃But　now；　baby；　it's　all　over。　I　don't　operate　now　and　I　feel　like　hell。　This　is　a　terrible　war；　baby。　You　believe　me　when　I　say　it。　Now　you　cheer　me　up。　Did　you　bring　the　phonograph　records？〃
〃Yes。〃
They　were　wrapped　in　paper　in　a　cardboard　box　in　my　rucksack。　I　was　too　tired　to　get　them　out。
〃Don't　you　feel　good　yourself；　baby？〃
〃I　feel　like　hell。〃
〃This　war　is　terrible；〃　Rinaldi　said。　〃e　on。　We'll　both　get　drunk　and　be　cheerful。　Then　we'll　go　get　the　ashes　dragged。　Then　we'll　feel　fine。〃
〃I've　had　the　jaundice；〃　I　said；　〃and　I　can't　get　drunk。〃
〃Oh；　baby；　how　you've　e　back　to　me。　You　e　back　serious　and　with　a　liver。　I　tell　you　this　war　is　a　bad　thing。　Why　did　we　make　it　anyway。〃
〃We'll　have　a　drink。　I　don't　want　to　get　drunk　but　we'll　have　a　drink。〃
Rinaldi　went　across　the　room　to　the　washstand　and　brought　back　two　glasses　and　a　bottle　of　cognac。
〃It's　Austrian　cognac；〃　he　said。　〃Seven　stars。　It's　all　they　captured　on　San　Gabriele。〃
〃Were　you　up　there？〃
〃No。　I　haven't　been　anywhere。　I've　been　here　all　the　time　operating。　Look；　baby；　this　is　your　old　tooth…brushing　glass。　I　kept　it　all　the　time　to　remind　me　of　you。〃
〃To　remind　you　to　brush　your　teeth。〃
〃No。　I　have　my　own　too。　I　kept　this　to　remind　me　of　you　trying　to　brush　away　the　Villa　Rossa　from　your　teeth　in　the　morning；　swearing　and　eating　aspirin　and　cursing　harlots。　Every　time　I　see　that　glass　I　think　of　you　trying　to　clean　your　conscience　with　a　toothbrush。〃　He　came　over　to　the　bed。　〃Kiss　me　once　and　tell　me　you're　not　serious。〃
〃I　never　kiss　you。　You're　an　ape。〃
〃I　know；　you　are　the　fine　good　Anglo…Saxon　boy。　I　know。　You　are　the　remorse　boy；　I　know。　I　will　wait　till　I　see　the　Anglo…Saxon　brushing　away　harlotry　with　a　toothbrush。〃
〃Put　some　cognac　in　the　glass。〃
We　touched　glasses　and　drank。　Rinaldi　laughed　at　me。
〃I　will　get　you　drunk　and　take　out　your　liver　and　put　you　in　a　good　Italian　liver　and　make　you　a　man　again。〃
I　held　the　glass　for　some　more　cognac。　It　was　dark　outside　now。　Holding　the　glass　of　cognac；　I　went　over　and　opened　the　window。　The　rain　had　stopped　falling。　It　was　colder　outside　and　there　was　a　mist　in　the　trees。
〃Don't　throw　the　cognac　out　the　window；〃　Rinaldi　said。　〃If　you　can't　drink　it　give　it　to　me。〃
〃Go　something　yourself；〃　I　said。　I　was　glad　to　see　Rinaldi　again。　He　had　spent　two　years　teasing　me　and　I　had　always　liked　it。　We　understood　each　other　very　well。
〃Are　you　married？〃　he　asked　from　the　bed。　I　was　standing　against　the　wall　by　the　window。
〃Not　yet。〃
〃Are　you　in　love？〃
〃Yes。〃
〃With　that　English　girl？〃
〃Yes。〃
〃Poor　baby。　Is　she　good　to　you？〃
〃Of　course。〃
〃I　mean　is　she　good　to　you　practically　speaking？〃
〃Shut　up。〃
〃I　will。　You　will　see　I　am　a　man　of　extreme　delicacy。　Does　she……？〃
〃Rinin；〃　I　said。　〃Please　shut　up。　If　you　want　to　be　my　friend；　shut　up。〃
〃I　don't　want　to　be　your　friend；　baby。　I　am　your　friend。〃
〃Then　shut　up。〃
〃All　right。〃
I　went　over　to　the　bed　and　sat　down　beside　Rinaldi。　He　was　holding　his　glass　and　looking　at　the　floor。
〃You　see　how　it　is；　Rinin？〃
〃Oh；　yes。　All　my　life　I　encounter　sacred　subjects。　But　very　few　with　you。　I　suppose　you　must　have　them　too。〃　He　looked　at　the　floor。
〃You　haven't　any？〃
〃Not　any？〃
〃No。〃
〃I　can　say　this　about　your　mother　and　that　about　your　sister？〃
〃And　that　about　your　sister；〃　Rinaldi　said　swiftly。　We　both　laughed。
〃The　old　superman；〃　I　said。
〃I　am　jealous　maybe；〃　Rinaldi　said。
〃No；　you're　not。〃
〃I　don't　mean　like　that。　I　mean　something　else。　Have　you　any　married　friends？〃
〃Yes；〃　I　said。
〃I　haven't；〃　Rinaldi　said。　〃Not　if　they　love　each　other。〃
〃Why　not？〃
〃They　don't　like　me。〃
〃Why　not？〃
〃I　am　the　snake。　I　am　the　snake　of　reason。〃
〃You're　getting　it　mixed。　The　apple　was　reason。〃
〃No；　it　was　the　snake。〃
He　was　more　cheerful。
〃You　are　better　when　you　don't　think　so　deeply；〃　I　said。
〃I　love　you；　baby；〃　he　said。　〃You　puncture　me　when　I　bee　a　great　Italian　thinker。　But　I　know　many　things　I　can't　say。　I　know　more　than　you。〃
〃Yes。　You　do。〃
〃But　you　will　have　a　better　time。　Even　with　remorse　you　will　have　a　better　time。〃
〃I　don't　think　so。〃
〃Oh；　yes。　That　is　true。　Already　I　am　only　happy　when　I　am　working。〃　He　looked　at　the　floor　again。
〃You'll　get　over　that。〃
〃No。　I　only　like　two　other　things；　one　is　bad　for　my　work　and　the　other　is　over　in　half　an　hour　or　fifteen　minutes。　Sometimes　less。〃
〃Sometimes　a　good　deal　less。〃
〃Perhaps　I　have　improved；　baby。　You　do　not　know。　But　there　are　only　the　two　things　and　my　work。〃
〃You'll　get　other　things。〃
〃No。　We　never　get　anything。　We　are　born　with　all　we　have　and　we　never　learn。　We　never　get　anything　new。　We　all　start　plete。　You　should　be　glad　not　to　be　a　Latin。〃
〃There's　no　such　thing　as　a　Latin。　That　is　'Latin'　thinking。　You　are　so　proud　of　your　defects。〃　Rinal