还乡The Return Of The Native-第94部分

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“You　mustn’t　judge　by　folks　in　general；”　said　Venn。　
“Still　I　don’t　know　much　what　feelings　are　nowadays。　　I　have　got　so　mixed　up　with　business　of　one　sort　and　t’other　that　my　soft　sentiments　are　gone　off　in　vapour　like。　　Yes；　I　am　given　up　body　and　soul　to　the　making　of　money。　
Money　is　all　my　dream。”
“O　Diggory；　how　wicked！”　said　Thomasin　reproachfully；　and　looking　at　him　in　exact　balance　between　taking　his　words　seriously　and　judging　them　as　said　to　tease　her。　
“Yes；　‘tis　rather　a　rum　course；”　said　Venn；　in　the　bland　tone　of　one　fortably　resigned　to　sins　he　could　no　longer　overe。　
“You；　who　used　to　be　so　nice！”
“Well；　that’s　an　argument　I　rather　like；　because　what　a　man　has　once　been　he　may　be　again。”　　Thomasin　blushed。　　“Except　that　it　is　rather　harder　now；”　Venn　continued。　
“Why？”　she　asked。　
“Because　you　be　richer　than　you　were　at　that　time。”
“O　no—not　much。　　I　have　made　it　nearly　all　over　to　the　baby；　as　it　was　my　duty　to　do；　except　just　enough　to　live　on。”
“I　am　rather　glad　of　that；”　said　Venn　softly；　and　regarding　her　from　the　corner　of　his　eye；　“for　it　makes　it　easier　for　us　to　be　friendly。”
Thomasin　blushed　again；　and；　when　a　few　more　words　had　been　said　of　a　not　unpleasing　kind；　Venn　mounted　his　horse　and　rode　on。　
This　conversation　had　passed　in　a　hollow　of　the　heath　near　the　old　Roman　road；　a　place　much　frequented　by　Thomasin。　　And　it　might　have　been　observed　that　she　did　not　in　future　walk　that　way　less　often　from　having　met　Venn　there　now。　　Whether　or　not　Venn　abstained　from　riding　thither　because　he　had　met　Thomasin　in　the　same　place　might　easily　have　been　guessed　from　her　proceedings　about　two　months　later　in　the　same　year。　


3　… The　Serious　Discourse　of　Clym　with　His　Cousin


Throughout　this　period　Yeobright　had　more　or　less　pondered　on　his　duty　to　his　cousin　Thomasin。　　He　could　not　help　feeling　that　it　would　be　a　pitiful　waste　of　sweet　material　if　the　tender…natured　thing　should　be　doomed　from　this　early　stage　of　her　life　onwards　to　dribble　away　her　winsome　qualities　on　lonely　gorse　and　fern。　　But　he　felt　this　as　an　economist　merely；　and　not　as　a　lover。　　His　passion　for　Eustacia　had　been　a　sort　of　conserve　of　his　whole　life；　and　he　had　nothing　more　of　that　supreme　quality　left　to　bestow。　　So　far　the　obvious　thing　was　not　to　entertain　any　idea　of　marriage　with　Thomasin；　even　to　oblige　her。　
But　this　was　not　all。　　Years　ago　there　had　been　in　his　mother’s　mind　a　great　fancy　about　Thomasin　and　himself。　　It　had　not　positively　amounted　to　a　desire；　but　it　had　always　been　a　favourite　dream。　　That　they　should　be　man　and　wife　in　good　time；　if　the　happiness　of　neither　were　endangered　thereby；　was　the　fancy　in　question。　　So　that　what　course　save　one　was　there　now　left　for　any　son　who　reverenced　his　mother’s　memory　as　Yeobright　did？　　It　is　an　unfortunate　fact　that　any　particular　whim　of　parents；　which　might　have　been　dispersed　by　half　an　hour’s　conversation　during　their　lives；　bees　sublimated　by　their　deaths　into　a　fiat　the　most　absolute；　with　such　results　to　conscientious　children　as　those　parents；　had　they　lived；　would　have　been　the　first　to　decry。　
Had　only　Yeobright’s　own　future　been　involved　he　would　have　proposed　to　Thomasin　with　a　ready　heart。　　He　had　nothing　to　lose　by　carrying　out　a　dead　mother’s　hope。　　But　he　dreaded　to　contemplate　Thomasin　wedded　to　the　mere　corpse　of　a　lover　that　he　now　felt　himself　to　be。　　He　had　but　three　activities　alive　in　him。　　One　was　his　almost　daily　walk　to　the　little　graveyard　wherein　his　mother　lay；　another；　his　just　as　frequent　visits　by　night　to　the　more　distant　enclosure　which　numbered　his　Eustacia　among　its　dead；　the　third　was　self…preparation　for　a　vocation　which　alone　seemed　likely　to　satisfy　his　cravings—that　of　an　itinerant　preacher　of　the　eleventh　mandment。　　It　was　difficult　to　believe　that　Thomasin　would　be　cheered　by　a　husband　with　such　tendencies　as　these。　
Yet　he　resolved　to　ask　her；　and　let　her　decide　for　herself。　　It　was　even　with　a　pleasant　sense　of　doing　his　duty　that　he　went　downstairs　to　her　one　evening　for　this　purpose；　when　the　sun　was　printing　on　the　valley　the　same　long　shadow　of　the　housetop　that　he　had　seen　lying　there　times　out　of　number　while　his　mother　lived。　
Thomasin　was　not　in　her　room；　and　he　found　her　in　the　front　garden。　　“I　have　long　been　wanting；　Thomasin；”　he　began；　“to　say　something　about　a　matter　that　concerns　both　our　futures。”
“And　you　are　going　to　say　it　now？”　she　remarked　quickly；　colouring　as　she　met　his　gaze。　　“Do　stop　a　minute；　Clym；　and　let　me　speak　first；　for　oddly　enough；　I　have　been　wanting　to　say　something　to　you。”
“By　all　means　say　on；　Tamsie。”
“I　suppose　nobody　can　overhear　us？”　she　went　on；　casting　her　eyes　around　and　lowering　her　voice。　　“Well；　first　you　will　promise　me　this—that　you　won’t　be　angry　and　call　me　anything　harsh　if　you　disagree　with　what　I　propose？”
Yeobright　promised；　and　she　continued：　“What　I　want　is　your　advice；　for　you　are　my　relation—I　mean；　a　sort　of　guardian　to　me—aren’t　you；　Clym？”
“Well；　yes；　I　suppose　I　am；　a　sort　of　guardian。　　In　fact；　I　am；　of　course；”　he　said；　altogether　perplexed　as　to　her　drift。　
“I　am　thinking　of　marrying；”　she　then　observed　blandly。　　“But　I　shall　not　marry　unless　you　assure　me　that　you　approve　of　such　a　step。　　Why　don’t　you　speak？”
“I　was　taken　rather　by　surprise。　　But；　nevertheless；　I　am　very　glad　to　hear　such　news。　　I　shall　approve；　of　course；　dear　Tamsie。　　Who　can　it　be？　　I　am　quite　at　a　loss　to　guess。　　No　I　am　not—‘tis　the　old　doctor！not　that　I　mean　to　call　him　old；　for　he　is　not　very　old　after　all。　　Ah—I　noticed　when　he　attended　you　last　time！”
“No；　no；”　she　said　hastily。　　“’Tis　Mr。　Venn。”
Clym’s　face　suddenly　became　grave。
“There；　now；　you　don’t　like　him；　and　I　wish　I　hadn’t　mentioned　him！”　she　exclaimed　almost　petulantly。　　“And　I　shouldn’t　have　done　it；　either；　only　he　keeps　on　bothering　me　so　till　I　don’t　know　what　to　do！”
Clym　looked　at　the　heath。　　“I　like　Venn　well　enough；”
he　answered　at　last。　　“He　is　a　very　honest　and　at　the　same
time　astute　man。　　He　is　clever　too；　as　is　proved　by　his
having　got　you　to　favour　him。　　But　really；　Thomasin；　he　is
not　quite—“
“Gentleman　enough　for　me？　　That　is　just　what　I　feel。　　I　am　sorry　now　that　I　asked　you；　and　I　won’t　think　any　more　of　him。　　At　the　same　time　I　must　marry　him　if　I　marry　anybody—that　I　WILL　say！”
“I　don’t　see　that；”　said　Clym；　carefully　concealing　every　clue　to　his　own　interrupted　intention；　which　she　plainly　had　not　guessed。　　“You　might　marry　a　professional　man；　or　somebody　of　that　sort；　by　going　into　the　town　to　live　and　forming　acquaintances　there。”
“I　am　not　fit　for　town　life—so　very　rural　and　silly　as　I　always　have　been。　　Do　not　you　yourself　notice　my　countrified　ways？”
“Well；　when　I　came　home　from　Paris　I　did；　a　little；　but　I　don’t　now。”
“That’s　because　you　have　got　countrified　too。　　O；　I　couldn’t　live　in　a　street　for　the　world！　Egdon　is　a　ridiculous　old　place；　but　I　have　got　used　to　it；　and　I　couldn’t　be　happy　anywhere　else　at　all。”
“Neither　could　I；”　said　Clym。　
“Then　how　could　you　say　that　I　should　marry　some　town　man？　　I　am　sure；　say　what　you　will；　that　I　must　marry　Diggory；　if　I　marry　at　all。　　He　has　been　kinder　to　me　than　anybody　else；　and　has　helped　me　in　many　ways　that　I　don’t　know　of！”　Thomasin　almost　pouted　now。
“Yes；　he　has；”　said　Clym　in　a　neutral　tone。　　“Well；　I　wish　with　all　my　heart　that　I　could　say；　marry　him。　　But　I　cannot　forget　what　my　mother　thought　on　that　matter；　and　it　goes　rather　against　me　not　to　respect　her　opinion。　　There　is　too　much　reason　why　we　should　do　the　little　we　can　to　respect　it　now。”
“Very　well；　then；”　sighed　Thomasin。　　“I　will　say　no　more。”
“But　you　are　not　bound　to　obey　my　wishes。　　I　merely　say　what　I　think。”
“O　no—I　don’t　want　to　be　rebellious　in　that　way；”　she　said　sadly。　　“I　had　no　business　to　think　of　him—I　ought　to　have　thought　of　my　family。　　What　dreadfully　bad　impulses　there　are　in　me！”　Her　lips　trembled；　and　she　turned　away　to　hide　a　tear。　
Clym；　though　vexed　at　what　seemed　her　unaccountable　taste；　was　in　a　measure　relieved　to　find　that　at　any　rate　the　marriage　question　in　relation　to　himself　was　s