简爱(英文版)-第32部分

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d　baying　which　removed　me　effectually　some　yards’　distance；　but　I　would　not　be　driven　quite　away　till　I　saw　the　event。　This　was　finally　fortunate；　the　horse　was　re…established；　and　the　dog　was　silenced　with　a　“Down；　Pilot！”　The　traveller　now；　stooping；　felt　his　foot　and　leg；　as　if　trying　whether　they　were　sound；　apparently　something　ailed　them；　for　he　halted　to　the　stile　whence　I　had　just　risen；　and　sat　down。
I　was　in　the　mood　for　being　useful；　or　at　least　officious；　I　think；　for　I　now　drew　near　him　again。
“If　you　are　hurt；　and　want　help；　sir；　I　can　fetch　some　one　either　from　Thornfield　Hall　or　from　Hay。”
“Thank　you：　I　shall　do：　I　have　no　broken　bones；—only　a　sprain；”　and　again　he　stood　up　and　tried　his　foot；　but　the　result　extorted　an　involuntary　“Ugh！”
Something　of　daylight　still　lingered；　and　the　moon　was　waxing　bright：　I　could　see　him　plainly。　His　figure　was　enveloped　in　a　riding　cloak；　fur　collared　and　steel　clasped；　its　details　were　not　apparent；　but　I　traced　the　general　points　of　middle　height　and　considerable　breadth　of　chest。　He　had　a　dark　face；　with　stern　features　and　a　heavy　brow；　his　eyes　and　gathered　eyebrows　looked　ireful　and　thwarted　just　now；　he　was　past　youth；　but　had　not　reached　middle…age；　perhaps　he　might　be　thirty…five。　I　felt　no　fear　of　him；　and　but　little　shyness。　Had　he　been　a　handsome；　heroic…looking　young　gentleman；　I　should　not　have　dared　to　stand　thus　questioning　him　against　his　will；　and　offering　my　services　unasked。　I　had　hardly　ever　seen　a　handsome　youth；　never　in　my　life　spoken　to　one。　I　had　a　theoretical　reverence　and　homage　for　beauty；　elegance；　gallantry；　fascination；　but　had　I　met　those　qualities　incarnate　in　masculine　shape；　I　should　have　known　instinctively　that　they　neither　had　nor　could　have　sympathy　with　anything　in　me；　and　should　have　shunned　them　as　one　would　fire；　lightning；　or　anything　else　that　is　bright　but　antipathetic。
If　even　this　stranger　had　smiled　and　been　good…humoured　to　me　when　I　addressed　him；　if　he　had　put　off　my　offer　of　assistance　gaily　and　with　thanks；　I　should　have　gone　on　my　way　and　not　felt　any　vocation　to　renew　inquiries：　but　the　frown；　the　roughness　of　the　traveller；　set　me　at　my　ease：　I　retained　my　station　when　he　waved　to　me　to　go；　and　announced—
“I　cannot　think　of　leaving　you；　sir；　at　so　late　an　hour；　in　this　solitary　lane；　till　I　see　you　are　fit　to　mount　your　horse。”
He　looked　at　me　when　I　said　this；　he　had　hardly　turned　his　eyes　in　my　direction　before。
“I　should　think　you　ought　to　be　at　home　yourself；”　said　he；　“if　you　have　a　home　in　this　neighbourhood：　where　do　you　e　from？”
“From　just　below；　and　I　am　not　at　all　afraid　of　being　out　late　when　it　is　moonlight：　I　will　run　over　to　Hay　for　you　with　pleasure；　if　you　wish　it：　indeed；　I　am　going　there　to　post　a　letter。”
“You　live　just　below—do　you　mean　at　that　house　with　the　battlements？”　pointing　to　Thornfield　Hall；　on　which　the　moon　cast　a　hoary　gleam；　bringing　it　out　distinct　and　pale　from　the　woods　that；　by　contrast　with　the　western　sky；　now　seemed　one　mass　of　shadow。
“Yes；　sir。”
“Whose　house　is　it？”
“Mr。　Rochester’s。”
“Do　you　know　Mr。　Rochester？”
“No；　I　have　never　seen　him。”
“He　is　not　resident；　then？”
“No。”
“Can　you　tell　me　where　he　is？”
“I　cannot。”
“You　are　not　a　servant　at　the　hall；　of　course。　You　are—”　He　stopped；　ran　his　eye　over　my　dress；　ple：　a　black　merino　cloak；　a　black　beaver　bon；　neither　of　them　half　fine　enough　for　a　lady’s…maid。　He　seemed　puzzled　to　decide　what　I　was；　I　helped　him。
“I　am　the　governess。”
“Ah；　the　governess！”　he　repeated；　“deuce　take　me；　if　I　had　not　forgotten！　The　governess！”　and　again　my　raiment　underwent　scrutiny。　In　two　minutes　he　rose　from　the　stile：　his　face　expressed　pain　when　he　tried　to　move。
“I　cannot　mission　you　to　fetch　help；”　he　said；　“but　you　may　help　me　a　little　yourself；　if　you　will　be　so　kind。”
“Yes；　sir。”
“You　have　not　an　umbrella　that　I　can　use　as　a　stick？”
“No。”
“Try　to　get　hold　of　my　horse’s　bridle　and　lead　him　to　me：　you　are　not　afraid？”
I　should　have　been　afraid　to　touch　a　horse　when　alone；　but　when　told　to　do　it；　I　was　disposed　to　obey。　I　put　down　my　muff　on　the　stile；　and　went　up　to　the　tall　steed；　I　endeavoured　to　catch　the　bridle；　but　it　was　a　spirited　thing；　and　would　not　let　me　e　near　its　head；　I　made　effort　on　effort；　though　in　vain：　meantime；　I　was　mortally　afraid　of　its　trampling　fore…feet。　The　traveller　waited　and　watched　for　some　time；　and　at　last　he　laughed。
“I　see；”　he　said；　“the　mountain　will　never　be　brought　to　Mahomet；　so　all　you　can　do　is　to　aid　Mahomet　to　go　to　the　mountain；　I　must　beg　of　you　to　e　here。”
I　came。　“Excuse　me；”　he　continued：　“necessity　pels　me　to　make　you　useful。”　He　laid　a　heavy　hand　on　my　shoulder；　and　leaning　on　me　with　some　stress；　limped　to　his　horse。　Having　once　caught　the　bridle；　he　mastered　it　directly　and　sprang　to　his　saddle；　grimacing　grimly　as　he　made　the　effort；　for　it　wrenched　his　sprain。
“Now；”　said　he；　releasing　his　under　lip　from　a　hard　bite；　“just　hand　me　my　whip；　it　lies　there　under　the　hedge。”
I　sought　it　and　found　it。
“Thank　you；　now　make　haste　with　the　letter　to　Hay；　and　return　as　fast　as　you　can。”
A　touch　of　a　spurred　heel　made　his　horse　first　start　and　rear；　and　then　bound　away；　the　dog　rushed　in　his　traces；　all　three　vanished；
“Like　heath　that；　in　the　wilderness；
The　wild　wind　whirls　away。”
I　took　up　my　muff　and　walked　on。　The　incident　had　occurred　and　was　gone　for　me：　it　was　an　incident　of　no　moment；　no　romance；　no　interest　in　a　sense；　yet　it　marked　with　change　one　single　hour　of　a　monotonous　life。　My　help　had　been　needed　and　claimed；　I　had　given　it：　I　was　pleased　to　have　done　something；　trivial；　transitory　though　the　deed　was；　it　was　yet　an　active　thing；　and　I　was　weary　of　an　existence　all　passive。　The　new　face；　too；　was　like　a　new　picture　introduced　to　the　gallery　of　memory；　and　it　was　dissimilar　to　all　the　others　hanging　there：　firstly；　because　it　was　masculine；　and；　secondly；　because　it　was　dark；　strong；　and　stern。　I　had　it　still　before　me　when　I　entered　Hay；　and　slipped　the　letter　into　the　post…　office；　I　saw　it　as　I　walked　fast　down…hill　all　the　way　home。　When　I　came　to　the　stile；　I　stopped　a　minute；　looked　round　and　listened；　with　an　idea　that　a　horse’s　hoofs　might　ring　on　the　causeway　again；　and　that　a　rider　in　a　cloak；　and　a　Gytrash…like　Newfoundland　dog；　might　be　again　apparent：　I　saw　only　the　hedge　and　a　pollard　willow　before　me；　rising　up　still　and　straight　to　meet　the　moonbeams；　I　heard　only　the　faintest　waft　of　wind　roaming　fitful　among　the　trees　round　Thornfield；　a　mile　distant；　and　when　I　glanced　down　in　the　direction　of　the　murmur；　my　eye；　traversing　the　hall…front；　caught　a　light　kindling　in　a　window：　it　reminded　me　that　I　was　late；　and　I　hurried　on。
I　did　not　like　re…entering　Thornfield。　To　pass　its　threshold　was　to　return　to　stagnation；　to　cross　the　silent　hall；　to　ascend　the　darksome　staircase；　to　seek　my　own　lonely　little　room；　and　then　to　meet　tranquil　Mrs。　Fairfax；　and　spend　the　long　winter　evening　with　her；　and　her　only；　was　to　quell　wholly　the　faint　excitement　wakened　by　my　walk；—to　slip　again　over　my　faculties　the　viewless　fetters　of　an　uniform　and　too　still　existence；　of　an　existence　whose　very　privileges　of　security　and　ease　I　was　being　incapable　of　appreciating。　What　good　it　would　have　done　me　at　that　time　to　have　been　tossed　in　the　storms　of　an　uncertain　struggling　life；　and　to　have　been　taught　by　rough　and　bitter　experience　to　long　for　the　calm　amidst　which　I　now　repined！　Yes；　just　as　much　good　as　it　would　do　a　man　tired　of　sitting　still　in　a　“too　easy　chair”　to　take　a　long　walk：　and　just　as　natural　was　the　wish　to　stir；　under　my　circumstances；　as　it　would　be　under　his。
I　lingered　at　the　gates；　I　lingered　on　the　lawn；　I　paced　backwards　and　forwards　on　the　pavement；　the　shutters　of　the　glass　door　were　closed；　I　could　not　see　into　the　interior；　and　both　my　eyes　and　spirit　seemed　drawn　from　the　gloomy　house—from　the　grey…hollow　filled　with　rayless　cells；　as　it　appeared　to　me—to　that　sky　expanded　before　me；—a　blue　sea　absolved　from　taint　of　cloud；　the　moon　ascending　it　in　solemn　march；　her　orb　seeming　to　look　up　as　she　left　the　hill…tops；　from　behind　which　she