little dorrit-信丽(英文版)-第94部分
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the house showing the goodness of the family。 You can have your droll
name again; playfully pointing you out and setting you apart; as it is
right that you should be pointed out and set apart。 (Your birth; you
know; you must not forget your birth。) You can again be shown to this
gentleman's daughter; Harriet; and kept before her; as a living reminder
of her own superiority and her gracious condescension。 You can recover
all these advantages and many more of the same kind which I dare say
start up in your memory while I speak; and which you lose in taking
refuge with me……you can recover them all by telling these gentlemen how
humbled and penitent you are; and by going back to them to be forgiven。
What do you say; Harriet? Will you go?'
The girl who; under the influence of these words; had gradually risen
in anger and heightened in colour; answered; raising her lustrous black
eyes for the moment; and clenching her hand upon the folds it had been
puckering up; 'I'd die sooner!'
Miss Wade; still standing at her side holding her hand; looked quietly
round and said with a smile; 'Gentlemen! What do you do upon that?'
Poor Mr Meagles's inexpressible consternation in hearing his motives and
actions so perverted; had prevented him from interposing any word until
now; but now he regained the power of speech。
'Tattycoram;' said he; 'for I'll call you by that name still; my good
girl; conscious that I meant nothing but kindness when I gave it to you;
and conscious that you know it……'
'I don't!' said she; looking up again; and almost rending herself with
the same busy hand。
'No; not now; perhaps;' said Mr Meagles; 'not with that lady's eyes so
intent upon you; Tattycoram;' she glanced at them for a moment; 'and
that power over you; which we see she exercises; not now; perhaps; but
at another time。 Tattycoram; I'll not ask that lady whether she believes
what she has said; even in the anger and ill blood in which I and my
friend here equally know she has spoken; though she subdues herself;
with a determination that any one who has once seen her is not likely
to forget。 I'll not ask you; with your remembrance of my house and all
belonging to it; whether you believe it。 I'll only say that you have
no profession to make to me or mine; and no forgiveness to entreat;
and that all in the world that I ask you to do; is; to count
five…and…twenty; Tattycoram。'
She looked at him for an instant; and then said frowningly; 'I won't。
Miss Wade; take me away; please。'
The contention that raged within her had no softening in it now; it
was wholly between passionate defiance and stubborn defiance。 Her rich
colour; her quick blood; her rapid breath; were all setting themselves
against the opportunity of retracing their steps。 'I won't。 I won't。
I won't!' she repeated in a low; thick voice。 'I'd be torn to pieces
first。 I'd tear myself to pieces first!'
Miss Wade; who had released her hold; laid her hand protectingly on the
girl's neck for a moment; and then said; looking round with her former
smile and speaking exactly in her former tone; 'Gentlemen! What do you
do upon that?'
'Oh; Tattycoram; Tattycoram!' cried Mr Meagles; adjuring her besides
with an earnest hand。 'Hear that lady's voice; look at that lady's face;
consider what is in that lady's heart; and think what a future lies
before you。 My child; whatever you may think; that lady's influence
over you……astonishing to us; and I should hardly go too far in saying
terrible to us to see……is founded in passion fiercer than yours; and
temper more violent than yours。 What can you two be together? What can
e of it?'
'I am alone here; gentlemen;' observed Miss Wade; with no change of
voice or manner。 'Say anything you will。'
'Politeness must yield to this misguided girl; ma'am;' said Mr Meagles;
'at her present pass; though I hope not altogether to dismiss it;
even with the injury you do her so strongly before me。 Excuse me for
reminding you in her hearing……I must say it……that you were a mystery
to all of us; and had nothing in mon with any of us when she
unfortunately fell in your way。 I don't know what you are; but you don't
hide; can't hide; what a dark spirit you have within you。 If it should
happen that you are a woman; who; from whatever cause; has a perverted
delight in making a sister…woman as wretched as she is (I am old enough
to have heard of such); I warn her against you; and I warn you against
yourself。'
'Gentlemen!' said Miss Wade; calmly。 'When you have concluded……Mr
Clennam; perhaps you will induce your friend……'
'Not without another effort;' said Mr Meagles; stoutly。 'Tattycoram;
my poor dear girl; count five…and…twenty。' 'Do not reject the hope; the
certainty; this kind man offers you;' said Clennam in a low emphatic
voice。 'Turn to the friends you have not forgotten。 Think once more!'
'I won't! Miss Wade;' said the girl; with her bosom swelling high; and
speaking with her hand held to her throat; 'take me away!'
'Tattycoram;' said Mr Meagles。 'Once more yet! The only thing I ask of
you in the world; my child! Count five…and…twenty!'
She put her hands tightly over her ears; confusedly tumbling down her
bright black hair in the vehemence of the action; and turned her face
resolutely to the wall。 Miss Wade; who had watched her under this final
appeal with that strange attentive smile; and that repressing hand
upon her own bosom with which she had watched her in her struggle at
Marseilles; then put her arm about her waist as if she took possession
of her for evermore。
And there was a visible triumph in her face when she turned it to
dismiss the visitors。
'As it is the last time I shall have the honour;' she said; 'and as you
have spoken of not knowing what I am; and also of the foundation of my
influence here; you may now know that it is founded in a mon cause。
What your broken plaything is as to birth; I am。 She has no name; I have
no name。 Her wrong is my wrong。 I have nothing more to say to you。'
This was addressed to Mr Meagles; who sorrowfully went out。 As Clennam
followed; she said to him; with the same external posure and in the
same level voice; but with a smile that is only seen on cruel faces: a
very faint smile; lifting the nostril; scarcely touching the lips; and
not breaking away gradually; but instantly dismissed when done with:
'I hope the wife of your dear friend Mr Gowan; may be happy in the
contrast of her extraction to this girl's and mine; and in the high good
fortune that awaits her。'
CHAPTER 28。 Nobody's Disappearance
Not resting satisfied with the endeavours he had made to recover his
lost charge; Mr Meagles addressed a letter of remonstrance; breathing
nothing but goodwill; not only to her; but to Miss Wade too。 No answer
ing to these epistles; or to another written to the stubborn girl
by the hand of her late young mistress; which might have melted her
if anything could (all three letters were returned weeks afterwards as
having been refused at the house…door); he deputed Mrs Meagles to make
the experiment of a personal interview。 That worthy lady being unable to
obtain one; and being steadfastly denied admission; Mr Meagles besought
Arthur to essay once more what he could do。 All that came of his
pliance was; his discovery that the empty house was left in charge
of the old woman; that Miss Wade was gone; that the waifs and strays of
furniture were gone; and that the old woman would accept any number of
half…crowns and thank the donor kindly; but had no information whatever
to exchange for those coins; beyond constantly offering for perusal a
memorandum relative to fixtures; which the house…agent's young man had
left in the hall。
Unwilling; even under this disfiture; to resign the ingrate and leave
her hopeless; in case of her better dispositions obtaining the mastery
over the darker side of her character; Mr Meagles; for six successive
days; published a discreetly covert advertisement in the morning papers;
to the effect that if a certain young person who had lately left
home without reflection; would at any time apply to his address at
Twickenham; everything would be as it had been before; and no re