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[夜与日].(night.and.day).(英)弗吉尼亚·伍尔芙.文字版-第82部分


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to see her unmasked; unrestrained; unconscious of her 
duties? a creature of uncalculating passion and instinctive 
freedom? No; he refused to believe it。 It was in her 
loneliness that Katharine was unreserved。 “I went back 
to my room by myself and I did—what I liked。” She had 

said that to him; and in saying it had given him a glimpse 
of possibilities; even of confidences; as if he might be 
the one to share her loneliness; the mere hint of which 
made his heart beat faster and his brain spin。 He checked 
himself as brutally as he could。 He saw her redden; and in 
the irony of her reply he heard her resentment。 

He began slipping his smooth; silver watch in his pocket; 
in the hope that somehow he might help himself back to 
that calm and fatalistic mood which had been his when 
he looked at its face upon the bank of the lake; for that 
mood must; at whatever cost; be the mood of his intercourse 
with Katharine。 He had spoken of gratitude and 
acquiescence in the letter which he had never sent; and 
now all the force of his character must make good those 
vows in her presence。 

She; thus challenged; tried meanwhile to define her 
points。 She wished to make Denham understand。 

“Don’t you see that if you have no relations with people 
it’s easier to be honest with them?” she inquired。 “That 
is what I meant。 One needn’t cajole them; one’s under no 
obligation to them。 Surely you must have found with your 

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own family that it’s impossible to discuss what matters 
to you most because you’re all herded together; because 
you’re in a conspiracy; because the position is false—” 
Her reasoning suspended itself a little inconclusively; for 
the subject was plex; and she found herself in ignorance 
whether Denham had a family or not。 Denham was 
agreed with her as to the destructiveness of the family 
system; but he did not wish to discuss the problem at 
that moment。 

He turned to a problem which was of greater interest to 
him。 

“I’m convinced;” he said; “that there are cases in which 
perfect sincerity is possible—cases where there’s no relationship; 
though the people live together; if you like; 
where each is free; where there’s no obligation upon either 
side。” 

“For a time perhaps;” she agreed; a little despondently。 
“But obligations always grow up。 There are feelings to be 
considered。 People aren’t simple; and though they may 
mean to be reasonable; they end”—in the condition in 
which she found herself; she meant; but added lamely— 

”in a muddle。” 

“Because;” Denham instantly intervened; “they don’t 
make themselves understood at the beginning。 I could 
undertake; at this instant;” he continued; with a reasonable 
intonation which did much credit to his selfcontrol; 
“to lay down terms for a friendship which should be perfectly 
sincere and perfectly straightforward。” 

She was curious to hear them; but; besides feeling that 
the topic concealed dangers better known to her than to 
him; she was reminded by his tone of his curious abstract 
declaration upon the Embankment。 Anything that hinted 
at love for the moment alarmed her; it was as much an 
infliction to her as the rubbing of a skinless wound。 

But he went on; without waiting for her invitation。 

“In the first place; such a friendship must be unemotional;” 
he laid it down emphatically。 “At least; on both 
sides it must be understood that if either chooses to fall 
in love; he or she does so entirely at his own risk。 Neither 
is under any obligation to the other。 They must be at 
liberty to break or to alter at any moment。 They must be 
able to say whatever they wish to say。 All this must be 

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Night and Day 

understood。” 

“And they gain something worth having?” she asked。 

“It’s a risk—of course it’s a risk;” he replied。 The word 

was one that she had been using frequently in her arguments 
with herself of late。 

“But it’s the only way—if you think friendship worth 
having;” he concluded。 

“Perhaps under those conditions it might be;” she said 
reflectively。 

“Well;” he said; “those are the terms of the friendship I 
wish to offer you。” She had known that this was ing; 
but; none the less; felt a little shock; half of pleasure; 
half of reluctance; when she heard the formal statement。 

“I should like it;” she began; “but—” 

“Would Rodney mind?” 

“Oh no;” she replied quickly。 

“No; no; it isn’t that;” she went on; and again came to 
an end。 She had been touched by the unreserved and yet 
ceremonious way in which he had made what he called 
his offer of terms; but if he was generous it was the more 
necessary for her to be cautious。 They would find them


selves in difficulties; she speculated; but; at this point; 
which was not very far; after all; upon the road of caution; 
her foresight deserted her。 She sought for some definite 
catastrophe into which they must inevitably plunge。 
But she could think of none。 It seemed to her that these 
catastrophes were fictitious; life went on and on—life 
was different altogether from what people said。 And not 
only was she at an end of her stock of caution; but it 
seemed suddenly altogether superfluous。 Surely if any one 
could take care of himself; Ralph Denham could; he had 
told her that he did not love her。 And; further; she meditated; 
walking on beneath the beechtrees and swinging 
her umbrella; as in her thought she was accustomed to 
plete freedom; why should she perpetually apply so 
different a standard to her behavior in practice? Why; she 
reflected; should there be this perpetual disparity between 
the thought and the action; between the life of 
solitude and the life of society; this astonishing precipice 
on one side of which the soul was active and in 
broad daylight; on the other side of which it was contemplative 
and dark as night? Was it not possible to step 

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Virginia Woolf 

from one to the other; erect; and without essential change? 
Was this not the chance he offered her—the rare and 
wonderful chance of friendship? At any rate; she told 
Denham; with a sigh in which he heard both impatience 
and relief; that she agreed; she thought him right; she 
would accept his terms of friendship。 

“Now;” she said; “let’s go and have tea。” 

In fact; these principles having been laid down; a great 
lightness of spirit showed itself in both of them。 They 
were both convinced that something of profound importance 
had been settled; and could now give their attention 
to their tea and the Gardens。 They wandered in and 
out of glasshouses; saw lilies swimming in tanks; breathed 
in the scent of thousands of carnations; and pared 
their respective tastes in the matter of trees and lakes。 
While talking exclusively of what they saw; so that any 
one might have overheard them; they felt that the pact 
between them was made firmer and deeper by the 
number of people who passed them and suspected nothing 
of the kind。 The question of Ralph’s cottage and future 
was not mentioned again。 

CHAPTER XXVI 


Although the old coaches; with their gay panels and the 
guard’s horn; and the humors of the box and the vicissitudes 
of the road; have long moldered into dust so far as 
they were matter; and are preserved in the printed pages 
of our novelists so far as they partook of the spirit; a 
journey to London by express train can still be a very 
pleasant and romantic adventure。 Cassandra Otway; at the 
age of twentytwo; could imagine few things more pleasant。 
Satiated with months of green fields as she was; the 
first row of artisans’ villas on the outskirts of London 
seemed to have something serious about it; which positively 
increased the importance of every person in the 
railway carriage; and even; to her impressionable mind; 
quickened the speed of the train and gave a note of stern 
authority to the shriek of the enginewhistle。 They were 
bound for London; they must have precedence of all traffic 
not similarly destined。 A different demeanor was necessary 
directly one stepped out up

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